Why does Moroccan society consider virginity a symbol of chastity and honor?

The eighteen-year-old young woman, Mahjoub, did not realize that the “night she entered” when she was married to her groom in one of the villages of Wadi Zam would end in a tragic end after the first meeting did not result in the appearance of the “mark of honor.” The groom had doubts about The virginity of his bride, so he resorted to rebuking her with punches on her eyes, without any of the aggressor's family interfering to save the bride, according to a previous narration of her father when he spoke to Hespress.

This reaction, which followed the groom's doubts about his bride's virginity, is not the first of its kind, and it may not be the last, despite the manifestations of modernity and openness that Moroccan society is apparently witnessing, in light of the dominance of a masculine mentality that sums up the girl's chastity, in her virginity.. So why is there still so much Of the Moroccans link the girl's chastity with the hymen? And why are violent reactions issued by the Moroccan man when he discovers that his bride is not a virgin?

Ignorance and lack of awareness

Dr. Amal Shabash, a specialist in psychological and sexual therapists, attributes what the groom of “Wadi Zam” did, who described his behavior towards his bride as “very terrible”, to three levels of ignorance, the first level being ignorance of the best way to deal with By the husband (groom) with his bride, even if he is sure, in fact, that she is not a virgin, saying, “On a human level, a girl should not be treated like this, even if there was a mistake.”

As for the second level of ignorance, which leads to such incidents - according to Dr. Shabash - it is due to the fact that many men are not aware that 20 percent of virgin girls do not shed any drop of blood, some defloration, and many girls are born Originally, without the hymen, and Dr. Shabash adds that the marital relationship “must not be based on what will result from the wedding night, nor on the red spot of blood, but on respect and communication.”

Syczychorrhea community

If there are still those in Moroccan society who link the girl's virginity to a drop - or drops of blood - that fall when the groom enters his bride, which regions in Morocco still consider a "sacred ritual", then the concept of virginity, - according to Dr. Amal Shabash - It is not related to the extent to which the girl retains her hymen or not, but rather when the girl has never had any sexual relations, and no man has touched her. Dr. Shabash adds, “We should not judge a girl’s chastity on the basis of a drop of blood, this is unreasonable.”

The specialist in psychological and sexual therapists stresses that each person is free in his choices, and must bear his responsibility, and explains, “There are many girls who have many sexual relations, but the question that must be asked is: who pushes these girls to have sexual relations, they are the men.” Of course, those who encourage girls to practice sex, in the name of love, and when a man wants to marry, he abandons the girl with whom he had a relationship, “as long as you don’t want to marry.”

The Moroccan man's mentality is changing

Dr. Chebash explains why the Moroccan man abandons the girl with whom he had previously had a sexual relationship, when he intends to marry, and his search for another girl, “who has not been touched by a man before,” with “the presence of schizophrenia in society,” and adds that the interest of different groups From men’s virginity, it is due to their considering the girl they are going to marry as “their own,” and no other human being should touch him, and they consider her a “thing,” and not a person with feelings and choices.

While groups of Moroccan men treat women in this way, there has been a great change and development, in recent years, in the way Moroccan men treat women, in general, and especially in the aspect related to intimate life; In this regard, Dr. Shabash explains that many men, according to the cases that come to her clinic, establish relationships based on respect, mutual trust, and communication.

Religion commanded concealment

As for the manner in which a man should deal with the girl he married to, if he is sure that she is not a virgin, and he does not accept that, Dr. Shabash said that the matter should not evolve into resorting to violence, as the “Wadi Zam groom” did, nor To expose the girl in public, but rather to deal with the matter calmly, “because the Islamic religion commands us to cover the other, and if the two parties to the marital relationship do not agree, they can resort to separation by mutual consent,” says Dr. Shabash.

The speaker adds that the responsibility also rests with the girl, who may not have had any relationship in her life, yet she does not shed any drop of blood when her husband enters her on the “wedding night.” In this regard, she tells the story of a bride who was brought by her family to Her clinic after her groom doubted her virginity, saying, “When the girl entered the clinic, she was walking with her head bowed, as if she was a victim, and when I asked her if you had ever had a relationship, she answered in the negative.” The psychotherapist and sexual therapist adds that a girl who wants to lie to her husband can To do so, with a simple operation, to mend the hymen.