If you can't change your world ... change your feelings

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Translation: Afnan Abu Abit

Amman- Everyone, and even most of us wish they would have changed parts of their reality. Think about your reality, think about something that causes you anxiety, stress and pain, you may have an inability to find a job or that you do not feel passionate about what you are doing. Or, you may feel lonely and not have real friendships. How can you change any of that? Perhaps you can change the place of housing, the quality of your friends, or your job. In other words, you can change your external world to feel your inner world. According to what was published on the "Atlantic" website, this is not easy, right? Continuous movement and change of job or friends is not practical, and it is also likely that you will take your problems with you to your new life as well, as you cannot escape yourself. You live between your life problems and your reactions on them, in this space there is freedom. You can choose to reshape your external world and start changing your reactions to it. Sometimes it is difficult, but it is necessary, in cases of violence and abuse, for example. Sometimes changing your circumstances is a small work, as if sleeping early, but between the two worlds, fighting reality is impossible or at all practical. You may be diagnosed with an incurable disease as it has no treatment or treatment opportunities. Perhaps the closest people to you will abandon you against your will. Perhaps you have the profession of your dreams, but not your dream manager, and no one will present to you a new manager. Your feelings may appear outside your control in the best and more disturbing time of crisis, and for this precisely change your feelings of greater benefit. In these cases, the blame may fall on our biological composition. Negative feelings such as anger and fear stimulate the two brain weighing, and in turn they awaken the instinct of caution, anticipation and avoiding danger. In other words, tension makes you fight, escape, or freeze. But today in our accelerated technical world, stress and anxiety are chronic disease and not passing moments for most of those who suffer from them. It is not surprising that chronic tension causes an incompatible adaptation. This includes drug addiction and alcohol, the rumination of the source of tension, the personal harm and the self -blaming. These responses are not only useful in providing long -term solutions; It is also possible to exacerbate suffering to addiction, depression and chronic tension. And when these defensive means fail to solve life problems, a person resorted to surrendering to his negative feelings and decides to try to change his external world. If you take a set of your problems and decide to run your feelings towards them and put a better strategy than changing the world around you, you can follow these four steps to reach reality Happiness: 1. Pay attention to your feelings when you monitor your feelings as if they belong to someone else, you can then provide better advice for yourself. In the end, you never advise your friend who is waiting for a medical examination to drink alcohol until the fruit. You have to look at your feelings, a distant and curious outlook. 2. Accept the idea of ​​changing your circumstances, if you are sad, it is a verb based on the assumption that your negative feelings must be annihilated. In many cases, negative feelings are strenuous and need treatment as in cases of depression and chronic tension. But in most life situations, negative emotions are an integral part of human experience, and getting rid of them will cause the paleness of your life. The specialized research also shows that negative feelings and experiences help people find the meaning of life and the goal behind them. 3. Reduce its expectations a common problem, so putting illogical expectations of how happiness and life must be. Calm yourself, and ask yourself if you ask the world to give you something that is not possible. Perhaps you are looking at the wrong direction to reach happiness. 4. He presented more studies at the French University of "ISAD" that people consider themselves victims of their circumstances and that they do not have any responsibility for what matters have become in their lives. It is also common for them to look at themselves as the victims while they are hurting their loved ones. The way to solve these repeated problems is by providing help and assistance to others without conditions. The help of others is the most efficient way to bring happiness to your life; By perpetuating the two contradictory ideas, you are a victim and the sacrifice at the same time. If you feel lonely in your business environment, ratify a colleague you feel suffering and need companionship just like you. If you are suffering with your health, find others with a similar experience to be listening ears and certain hands for each other. In carrying the weights of others, life raises you up.